Top tips to start exorcising this Halloween

It’s been on the list for a while. You bought the equipment two Halloween’s ago but the sage has been stuffed into a chicken and the holy water has dried up.

The good news is that there are other ways to exorcise yourself – to get off that couch and into a land thousands of miles away.

Here’s our beginner’s guide to start exorcising.

1. Consult a travel doctor

Before you start anything, it’s best to talk to an expert. Exorcisms are our bread and butter. We’ve been getting people out of their funks for so long, we’ve lost count of the number of free spirits on our books. Talk to us to understand your demon and turn that Debbie Downer into an out-of-towner. Most curses can be lifted with a flight ticket.

2. Plan your journey

Once you’ve got an idea of the right exorcism for you, it’s time to plan your journey. How long do you want to exorcise? How often will you exorcise? We have everything from 4 week to 24 month exorcise plans. But set realistic goals. What journey do you need to escape those evil, couch-bound spirits?

3. Equipment for exorcising

Ok, so you’ve got no gear and half an idea. That’s fine. Sometimes those inner demons just need a little encouragement. Having the right equipment will make exorcising feel a lot less haunting...sorry, daunting. Get your spirit a pair of snow boots or a going-out-out outfit. Essentially, distract your possession with new shiny possessions.

4. Don't forget to warm up

We’ve all done it. We think we don’t need to stretch, we jump straight in to exorcising and then we pull a hammy. It happens. Don’t make that mistake. Watch our YouTube channel, visualise yourself on a Canadian ski slope, put your favourite travel pants on. Only when you’re feeling mentally limbered up should you start exorcising.

5. Playlists for exorcising

Motivational music is important. We’re thinking Franz Ferdinand’s ‘Take me out’, Goyte’s ‘Somebody that I used to know’. Throw some Ghostbusters in there. Maybe Gloria Gaynor?

6. Ghost your demons

Exorcising can be hard. You’ll have moments where you think ‘maybe I don’t want to exorcise’. That’s your couch demon speaking. Don’t listen, show them you’re not afraid of getting a bit sweaty and stepping out of your comfort zone. Yes, maybe it would be nice to fall asleep on the couch eating yum yums...SHUT IT DEMON!

7. Do a proper cool down

You’ve done it. You got off the couch and completed the 6,000K. Now, take some time to appreciate how far you’ve come, literally. That’s really far. Hydrate yourself, find some local carbs, enjoy post-exorcism life in a new land!

There you have it, top tips for exorcising away the everyday. It can feel scary when your life is possessed by over-familiar bus routes and disappointing meal deals.

But Halloween is the perfect time to exorcise this borefest and book yourself an out-of-body / out-of-country experience.